There's a Holiday Tomorrow, Shop Now!

 

I went to the store today to buy some coffee and milk.  As I write that sentence and reflect on how innocuous that sounds, I think of how I felt when I left the house to go to the supermarket this morning.  It seemed like a typical Saturday, and I expected the store to be a little busier than it would be on a weeknight (when I usually go shopping).  How wrong I was.

I forgot to consider that the store will be closed tomorrow, and that meant that everyone and their dog would be at the supermarket stocking up.  I had never seen so many carts full to the brim.  It was just like I see on those coupon shows where the husband and wife are pulling three shopping carts up to the checkout at a time.

Perhaps I just don't understand the significance of a holiday.  The supermarket will be closed for one whole day.  I guess that is reason enough to panic.  When the zombie apocalypse arrives, I'm sure we will be no less vigilant.  Heaven forbid anyone run out of Pillsbury crescent rolls or tacquitos.  We're talking life or death here.

I just couldn't join the fray.  I didn't even bother getting a cart.  I took a handbasket and tried to get out as quickly as possible.  I easily qualified for the express lane, but couldn't get over to it, so just lined up behind anyone I could.  I was almost run over by carts numerous times.  I heard several people remark on how "crazy" it was, but they didn't give up and go home either.

All I can conclude is that life is weird.

Get Out of My Way

 

 

Suitcases with telescopic handles and actually functioning wheels is are a great idea.  Fantastic.  My first luggage set came with casters (which are not wheels, no matter what you think) and was more likely to tip over than casually trail behind me at the airport.  So, I welcome these great inventions.  However, whatever person thought that they should replace their briefcase, or purse, or whatever they pack all their work or school crap in and take them to public places should be publicly flogged.

On my bus journey there are a couple of these offenders.  Their bags stick out into the aisleways, they take much more time to get on and off the bus, and worse, while navigating the space between the bus and the subway platforms, they weave all over the place cutting people like me off.  When you have to pull a trailer on your car, you need to do some training (don't you)?  These people seem incredibly oblivious to the large rolling mass behind them.  They don't seem to care that my feet get run over, or that I trip when the seemingly uncontrollable need to move side to side strikes these rolling suitcases of death.

I could write about idiots with backpacks that clunk into people's heads with alarming frequency--certainly there is a special place in hell for them (hopefully next to the idiots with their MP3 players turned up too loud, or next to room full of overly loud cell phone users who talk about mostly inappropriate topics)  I could write about any number of clearly foolish people.  Right now, though, I need all my venom for people and their large rolling suitcases.

What are they transporting to and from work that they need such a large bag?  If I was their boss, I would certainly be wondering if corporate espionage was behind it.  Either way, they take up too much space, and seem always to be in my way when I have places to go.

People and Guns

 

 

I have been reading a lot about guns.  After the tragedy, this is unavoidable.  I have read many arguments for and against gun control, and I firmly side with control.  If you're against gun control, there is probably nothing I am going to do to change your mind, but I have to do something.

I really only want to tackle one argument that I keep hearing.  Guns don't kill people, people kill people.  I have read that in many forms throughout this debate.  Most recently someone said, guns aren't the problem, people are the problem.  Guns are no more to blame than car accidents.

HMMMMMM?

If we believe that argument (which I don't) we place all the blame at the feet of people.  So how do we solve that problem?  Do we put every person in jail?  Do we do a psychological profile on every person in the country?  Do we step on every liberty they have, to save one?  If people are the problem, maybe not allowing them access to guns, ammunition, and training is the answer.  By the above argument, we need to stop people from getting guns....... so wouldn't banning guns be the answer?

Stupidity Abounds

So someone decided to become famous by plotting to kill Justin Bieber...?  Really?  Has the world really sunk that low?  Have we reached rock bottom even before the end of the world the Mayans predicted?  What kind of rocket scientist came up with that idea?  Just when I think I have seen or heard the stupidest thing ever, the world shows me that it can find an even lower place, and even greater absurdity.

First and foremost, you don't become famous for killing someone famous.  You become infamous, and that isn't the same thing at all.  Infamous people end up in jail, on death row, or camping out in the woods plotting the destruction of the world on a manual IBM Selectric.  Infamous people are not famous, despite the similarity in spelling.

I have seen and heard drunken morons and completely high idiots plotting bizarre fantasies not unlike these.... but they tend to leave those with the drunk or the stoned nature from the night before and not cart them out into the sane bright light of morning.  The idea couldn't have sounded good when they were drunk (not really) but how could it gained any kind of approval when the people were sober.  This leads me to conclude that they were either never sober or that their IQ's total a single digit number.