Sunday, September 29, 2013

The Candy Conspiracy.


It's still September and the Halloween candy is already for sale.  Sure, why not get a head start on event.  It makes sense....but does it?  What I realized is, the candy you buy today, really isn't for Halloween.  That candy is for you.  You are going to have to go back to the store and buy more candy before the night  is actually here.

Don't worry.  That's all part of the plan.  I am not talking about life's plan. I am talking about the junk food companies' plan.  How else could they sell so much candy?  They know you'll break down and start sampling the products.  They count on it.  They bank on you not having the willpower to resist.  Buy candy now, and buy candy later.

Now, don't get me wrong.  There are some people out there with the willpower to resist.  There are some people who can fight off the temptation--I'm not one of them, but I know they exist.  Those people are not the ones that the candy companies want to talk to.

I wish I could help you and give you some useful tips.  All I can say is the more you give away, the less you eat.

By the way, when I was young, Halloween was spelled differently.  What happened?

Monday, September 16, 2013

A Bright Idea


 
I notice that there is a new iPhone available.  They call it the iPhone 5S.There has been a lot of hoopla and a lot of media noise.  Nobody asked an interesting question.  Why isn't there a solar charging feature?

I know, I know.  You're going to tell me that a tiny solar cell on the top of the phone couldn't possibly charge up the phone.  Although it works for a watch and a calculator, it couldn't do the job of a USB cable.  No argument.  The only thing is, couldn't it help?

The way I look at it, there is always the time when you really need your phone and that is the time when the battery dies.  At that moment, wouldn't it be nice to have a chance to get a little power back into your phone?  Maybe a solar cell could provide this emergency power.

I guess I should have contacted Apple before now.  Do you think they would have listened?

Thursday, September 12, 2013

What's my Size?


Japanese beer comes in many sizes
 
Who determines what size something should come in?  I mean, who decided that we need four litres of milk in three bags?  Whose idea was it to sell hamburger buns in packages of eight?  What genius determined that my bag of spaghetti should contain 900 grams of dried pasta?

Now, I know, I have ranted about the size of things before.  Mostly, though, I was complaining about how they have made everything smaller.  I still feel quite strongly about that injustice, but this rant is different.  I am not complaining, just wondering.

I was making spaghetti earlier this evening when I noticed that the weight of the pasta package was 900 grams.  Why didn't they just make it a full kilogram?  Dried pasta is not exactly a high ticket item.  I stopped to reconsider.  I considered maybe they were selling it in pounds.  Nine hundred grams comes close to two pounds.  I checked the label, and no, actually it equals 1.98 lbs.  I don't know who should feel more ripped off.

If you really think about it, how do you decide what is the right size to sell something?  Is there a certain quantity that we can not exceed?  Is there a certain price we won't pay for something?  Considering how popular Costco and Price Club are, neither one of those things can really be true.  If someone is willing to buy a 20 litre container of mustard (for whatever price 20 Litres of mustard must cost) then you could almost sell them 20 Litres of anything....couldn't you?

Some of this must be historical.  Anything sold in sets of twelve must be connected to a bakery.  This still doesn't explain the hot dog bun versus hotdog package...but don't get me started.  I am pretty happy with the 24 of beer, but since I have seen 28 packs and 32 packs, this number seems kind of arbitrary.

Beverage companies decided that cans of pop should be 355mL.  It seems to be the right size--but then why is the coke company trying to foist those 700mL bottles on us?  I guess they thought we needed more, so instead of screwing around they just said double.  I guess nobody bothered to suggest triple.

Maybe none of this should really bother me, maybe I should let is slide.  The problem is that I live in a country that uses the metric system.  The whole beauty behind the metric system is the nice, useful, easily manipulated numbers it produces.  They still sell butter by the pound, but at least they print the metric numbers on the label.

I guess somebody made the decisions, and that is what we are left with.  If somebody had asked me, I might have been able to convince them to choose another size.  My pasta would come in 1Kg bags and there would be five tennis balls in a can instead of three.

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Library Blues


 
 
As part of the commuter lifestyle, I tend to read a lot (when I am not doing the crossword or Sudoku puzzles).  In an effort to be economical or frugal (you can read that as cheap), I take books out of the library.  I hate to rant on the library because its advantages greatly outweigh its disadvantages.  It had lots of books, DVD's, CD's, comic books, graphic novels, magazines and a whole bunch of other stuff that I don't access, but is probably great for other people (seminars, art shows etc.).

Nonetheless, I have two problems.  These two problems have nothing to do with due dates or late fines.  Those things, while slightly stressful, have their place and are necessary.  What bothers me is the way they have done their digital book offerings, and the way that they either don't have some books, or the wait list is has me getting the book sometime in the next decade.

I bought a Kobo, and I am quite happy with it.  I have had difficulty with e-books that the library has, though.  Why is there only one copy?  If it is digital, should there be an infinite number of copies?  It isn't like I am actually taking the data off their hard drive.  It won't be lost.  The copies are programmed to delete themselves after three weeks.... Is it that the library system in Ontario has somehow confused the past with the present.  Are they unable to see the digital forest for the trees?  Are they trying to make the digital age represent the way things used to be?  One only needs to look at how Netflix put an end to Blockbuster to understand how wrong this kind of thinking is.

Maybe there are some copyright issues involved, but those should be explained, rather than hoping that we just understand.

As for not having books...yes, I understand there are space and budget constraints.  There are plans to expand my library, so hopefully they will have more space for books.  My problem is that I want to read a series of books in order, and sometimes the library doesn't have one or more of the books in the series.  If you have most of the series, and are hoping that people take the books out, not having the whole series is kind of ridiculous, don't you think?  Most recently, I have read Jim Butcher's Dresden Files books, but due to availability I have read them completely out of order.  You can guess that I am slightly confused, but starting to make sense of it.

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Schools Back......



There is a buzz in the air.  It is a mix of nervous energy and eager anticipation.  School is in and the kids are back in it.  There is definitely an air of hope and dreams in the air.  It is a great time of year....

That is, unless you're riding the bus with these loud obnoxious leaders of tomorrow.  Though I risk sounding like a crotchety old man, they're just talking loud and saying nothing.  Nothing at all.  If it sounds like I am eavesdropping, I'm not.  I really don't want to hear what they have to say, but they must think I am interested, because they don't seem to practice any form of editing.  They stuff they will say into their cell phones is amazing.  Either they think no one can hear them, or they just want to broadcast their sexcapades.  If I knew their names and could contact their parents.... well, lets just say that the blackmail money could be quite lucrative.  Of course, then, I wouldn't have to ride the bus.

 
Mostly, I guess, it's just the crowds.  My bus is always full, but it seems more so now.  Before, I always got a seat, and could even sit by myself for a few stops before some overly large man (as to an attractive petite woman) with obvious spatial recognition issues would shoehorn himself in beside me. I can still get a seat, but the pickings are slim and the bus is full much quicker.  I guess it's a good thing that I live near the end of the line.

Either I will get used to it, or some of them will drop out of school.  Maybe I should just buy better headphones.

Sunday, September 1, 2013

New and Improved means Smaller and Just as Expensive




Once again the evidence is clear.  Some ad executive somewhere has decided that "new and improved" is a fantastic cover story for smaller, but not less expensive.  I have written about this before, but I have to make the case again.  I have to rant and rage because it really bother's me.   We let it happen to potato chips (remember the two separate bags in a big bag of chips?) and we can't let it happen again.

Maybe it is too late.  Maybe we are destined for a shrinking world rather than a higher priced world.  Maybe, because we balked at the higher price we took comfort in the same price for less.


What started this rant was my body wash.  I noticed the size discrepancy while taking my shower.  Not the most pleasant way to wake up I can assure you.   They couldn't even reduce it by a round number...causing me to do math before I had my coffee.  If that isn't disrespectful, I don't know what is.
 
New and Improved--and 89millitres smaller!

Before we become too complacent, we should consider the ramifications for this.  Do you really want to buy hotdogs in a five pack?  We already have the inconsistent 8 pack of hotdogs and the six pack of buns.  Do you want to smaller ketchup bottles?  We had them when I was young--they were glass mind you, and I kind of miss them now.  Could you drink a 150 millilitre box of chocolate milk?

I was looking at the remastered box set of Star Trek the Original series today.  In that first season they shot 29 episodes.  That's right, 29.  Let that number sink in.  Now 22 or 23 seems to be the norm (and I am not even thinking about those 8 or 12 episode seasons which HBO seams to favour).  Of course, prior to that it was not uncommon to have 36 episode seasons.

Why is it that the things I want to become smaller never seem to.  I wouldn't mind smaller commercial breaks.  I certainly wouldn't say no to shorter speeches by politicians.  Shorter acceptance speeches for award winners or beauty contestants is a must-- this might have saved a certain Miss Teen USA some embarrassment.  Pre-game shows are longer than the games themselves.

Can I blame shrinking products for all this?  No.  All of these things are symptoms, not the cause.  The cause was the desire to make money at the expense of the customer.  The only problem is that I am one of the customers.  I don't like it.  I am going to keep calling them out until they listen.