GET ON THE ROAD

What is it with people riding their bikes on the sidewalk?  Does this bother anyone other than me?  Do you people actually think it is safer?  I've got news for you, it isn't.

Let's take a step back before the ranting will really continue.  I know, kids on tricycles shouldn't be on the road.  I am not suggesting endangering the lives of children.  No.  Not at all.

I could explain the law to people, but that wouldn't be right.  These adults should already be familiar with the law.  Of course, if the law were to actually ticket these people, maybe they would get the message.  I realize that it isn't feasible--but there might come a day when the provincial government sees the opportunity for a cash grab (imagine that) and decides all adult cyclists need a licence (it isn't as funny as it sounds).  Well see how that turns out.

Bikes on the sidewalk pose a couple of problems, and I grant some of them are exacerbated by walkers.  Usually, if you were to come up behind someone on a bike, you should ring your bell or honk your horn (probably a law) to warn them of your approach.  While I haven't seen any of these modern day road warriors have bells on their bikes (probably spent all their money on overpriced bikes and fashion accessories--see the next blog for thoughts on that), and since most people 30 and under can't go anywhere without their ear buds in, they wouldn't hear it if you did honk.  Seems like a recipe for disaster.

The second problem is for motorists.  When we look left and right coming out of a shopping mall, or store parking lot, we scan the road for fast moving vehicles.  We scan the sidewalk for slower moving objects.  If your closing speed is between a person walking and a car driving, you might get overlooked.  Heck, the way some buildings are designed, we can't see you based on your closing speed.

Get on the road.

A Harangue Against the Lazy

The kind of laziness I really hate.

 

Why are people so lazy?  I know, people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.  Yes, I admit I am lazy, but not about everything.  Lazy cook?  Yes.  Study Japanese lazy?  Yes, sometimes.  I could write down a long list of things I am lazy about.  Walking is not one of them.

Before you get scared and roll your eyes, this is not a harangue about people who drive their cars when they could walk.  This isn't even a harangue about people who park illegally in disable parking (they should be shot, even if they have a sticker they "borrowed" from a family member).  This is a different harangue altogether.

There are two types of lazy people that bother me the most.  The people who take the elevator one floor, and the people who use the automatic door open button.  Let's take them one at a time.

Taking the elevator one floor is wrong.  No wonder North America has a weight problem.  If you've never been to the building, and don't know where the stairwell is (despite clear signs directing you to it) perhaps you have a reason for your sad, pathetic behaviour.  However, after multiple visits and guided tours, you're just pissing the rest of us off.  When I take the elevator up to the twentieth floor, I don't expect or want to stop at every floor.  I'm not in a Japanese department store.

As for using the automatic door opener..... if you're a child, I won't blame you.  An automatic door is cool.  I will blame your parents though if you continue to do this into your teen years.  What's wrong with you?  Is the door too heavy?  Are you unable to read which way it opens, and therefore need to press that button to stop you from looking stupid? (By the way, it doesn't work that way.  Pressing the button makes you look stupid and feeble.)  You're in the way, and you're taking too long to get through the door.

The Hotdog Conspiracy

now sold in packages of 5

 

I was doing my weekly shopping and thought, hey, why don't I get some hotdogs.  They weren't on sale, but they are a quick and easy meal.  I know which ones I like, and I know where they are in the store.  I quickly go there and pick up a package.

What!

There is something completely strange here.

There are only 5 hotdogs in the package.

Five?

I had to count several times.  I looked around, thinking this must be a hidden camera segment.  Apparently not--but I have checked YouTube repeatedly, just in case.  So, naturally, I checked the buns.

Six, as usual.

Quite the conundrum.

When I was a child they sold hotdogs in packs of twelve and buns in packs of 8.  I thought that was strange, but once I learned a little math, I figured two packages of hotdogs and three packages of buns and all was well in the world.  If I do that to today's problem I get six packages of hotdogs and five packages of buns.

Someone at Schneider's wants you to eat 30 hotdogs.  30 hotdogs!

Obviously, this is another example of lowering the quantity while maintaining the price.  (see my previous post on this phenomenon    http://theoctagonalpeg.blogspot.ca/2013/09/new-and-improved-means-smaller-and-just.html) This seems pretty easy when you do it to liquids, or things that are sold by weight, but why do it to hotdogs.  They could have made the hotdogs smaller.  I probably wouldn't have noticed, and might have appreciated the better fit to the bun and the reduced calories.

What to do?  I guess I should consider the possibilities.

Possibilities

1. I buy them all and store them in my freezer.  I don't know if I actually have that much space.  I am also not sure I can eat 30 hotdogs in one year.
2. Buy one package and either throw out the last bun or keep it frozen until the next time.  Two problems with this.  I usually eat two hotdogs at a time.  That means one hotdog will go to waste and two buns will stay frozen for a long time.  It is also likely that I will forget about these things and buy new buns the next time.  Soon my freezer will be overloaded with mismatched freezer burnt buns.
3. I forget the whole thing and buy something healthier to eat.  And that's what I did.

Hockey Afternoon in Canada

I associate some sports with a time of day.  Baseball is an afternoon game.  Football is an afternoon game.  Aussie Rules Football is the middle of the night, and Cricket is on quite late.  I also put Muay Thai kickboxing as a post midnight event.  Hockey, however, is a night game.  Despite watching the NY Islanders win the first of their Stanley Cups early one afternoon, I still see these as night games.

Of course this is a TV thing.  Those post midnight sports that I mentioned are like that because that is when I watch them on TV.  If they sports channels weren't some overrun by poker, then perhaps their would be room in the daytime schedule for some of these sports.  That's another issue for another day.

Let's get back to hockey.  Maybe it's a Canadian thing.  I always think Hockey Night in Canada, not Hockey Afternoon in Canada.  Maybe, in other markets, hockey sells better, or gets better ratings.  Maybe, someone wants to keep prime time open for the NBA finals.  Maybe, I am not aware of all the business ramifications. 

I like a beer or two with my hockey games....does that mean I can start drinking at noon?

If It's Too Cold, Why Did You Go Skiing?

Is it right to complain when you knew exactly what you were getting yourself into?  What I mean is, if the situation was clear to you before it began, and you had a choice, don't you forfeit any right to whine and moan?

Last week I took a bus trip to go skiing.  Everyone chose to go on the trip and paid their money.  At the same time, some people cancelled at the last minute, but were not chastised in any way, or even charged money for the trip.  Almost all of them (I would guess that in fact it was each and every one of them, but I didn't bother taking survey) had a smart phone--certainly all of them had access to a television.  So when the weather report was forecasting a somewhat cold temperature (minus 17 I think) it wasn't really out of the blue.

None of this would have mattered if it didn't change the rules.  What it did was shorten the trip by one hour before it even begun.  Fearing the cold, despite wearing some rather expensive thermal gear, many people grumbled and got the trip ending changed.  Of course this was decided before anyone got on the slopes or even tried to cope with the cold.

Had I not wanted to ski, or fallen, or been having a miserable day, I wouldn't have tried to get everyone to leave early.  I would have gone to the lodge to stay warm and waited.  If I had felt I was too cold, I would have either not gone on the trip, or waited in the warm lounge.  At the very least I would have set a midday meeting before making any of these decisions.

As it was, most of the people who lobbied for early release arrived late for the bus.  I guess they were enjoying themselves skiing, despite the cold.

Looking for some Liberty

The trek through IKEA is rather stressful.  They've laid out the place like a course that they want you to follow.  Rather than go up and down rows based on my needs or desires, they would prefer that I follow their meandering course so that I pass every single thing they are selling.  Imagine if all stores and places were like that?

What if YouTube didn't allow me to search for videos that I wanted?  What if I had to do things there way instead of mine.  Okay, actually, they seem to be changing YouTube to force me to do thing that I don't want.  Maybe they took a page from Apple or Microsoft and decided that it's their way or the highway.

But I digress....as much as they will let me.

I just want some liberty.  We talk about freedom, but we really don't seem to have it.  Maybe Rousseau was right.  Stay inside the lines, have your quarter for your shopping car deposit, no substitutions with your combo meal, no you can't have those channels with that cable package.  I grant that none of these things is really that oppressive..... but they kind of are.

I don't think freedom is about doing whatever you want.  I do think freedom should not allow you to harm others, or even bother others.  If I believed that you should do whatever you want whenever you want without regard to anyone, then I wouldn't mind those annoying people on the bus whose crappy music bleeds out of their earphones.

No, I just want freedom from the people who could so easily give it to me.  I want to choose the channel I can watch.  If nobody wants a crappy channel, then it will go out of business and free up advertising dollars for someone else.  If I want to quickly blast through IKEA without checking out every piece of unpronounceable furniture, that should be my right.  If I want to have multiple names on my YouTube account, leave me alone.

No Video No Cry

 

 

The last blockbuster store is closing.  Should I weep?  I don't think so.  They should have seen the writing on the wall.  They should have known their business model was almost finished.  They, along with DVD distribution companies, soaked us long enough.  They had their late fees, and high prices for new releases.  They got their money, they just forgot to get out of the game while the getting was good.

Now we have Netflix, or other semi legal (and semi illegal) options.  There is another option.  The one I use is the library.  The library has lots of DVD's right now.  This may not last forever, but it should be good for a while.  Unfortunately, nobody cleans the DVD's at the library, and people who get things for free don't treat them well.  Why respect anyone property if you don't have to (insert sarcastic indignation here).

What will the future bring?  Good question.  I don't know, but I do know I will not be weeping because Blockbuster didn't adapt to the times.